Want To Sleep Through The Night and Breastfeed? You CAN Do Both!

When I was expecting Baby O, I read a few articles and blog posts about babies. After working with kids for years and having studied infant toddler development in school, I thought I knew exactly what I was getting into.

What I wasn’t prepared for was the sheer amount of information out there, and how conflicting it all was. Even among medical professionals, the number of times I must have read one person say that something was essential to do, just to read the same thing was objectively wrong or harmful by another, was so confusing! As most parents do, I took that information, thought it through with what I knew about children and came up with a strategy I was comfortable with.

What Is Sleeping Through The Night?

But one thing I never anticipated having to look into was sleep train while I was breastfeeding. Since I thought I would just be a "super mom" and have the most amazing baby, it never even crossed my mind! Not until Baby O was still waking multiple times through the night at over 5 months did it become something I had to think about (because I was beyond exhausted!). When I checked in with our pediatrician about it, he said it sounded normal for a 5 month old breastfed baby.

The basic argument against the idea was that breast milk gets digested faster than formula, and therefore babies who are breastfed need to wake up several times a night in order to feed. Otherwise, they’ll feel hungry throughout the night, be unable to sleep, and potentially suffer from malnutrition. And while I didn't want him to starve, I needed to not wake up 4+ times a night!

Like most things in parenting, there’s not so much of a wrong or right, its really just whats right for your child. Below will help you have a better idea if sleep training while breastfeeding is right for you and your family. Because what’s the point of sleep training if hunger will prevent them from sleeping through the night?

Well guess what?! This may shock you but...Nobody sleeps through the night!

You might think you do, or that you did before you had kids, or that your partner does. But I assure you that you don't! Think about the times you roll over, fluff your pillow, pull the blanket up or down. All of those are signs showing you don't seamlessly sleep through the night.

When we sleep, we go through “sleep cycles,” and these cycles go from light sleep to deep sleep and back again, typically about four or five times a night. When we get to the end of a cycle and enter into that really light stage of sleep, we often wake up. Thinking back to your night last night, can you remember how many times you woke up? Most likely, it happens so fast that you don't even register it.

Sleep Cycles and Digestion

Babies’ sleep cycles are shorter than adult ones, so they wake up more often in the night. Babies who are said to sleep through the night are still waking up, but they manage to get themselves back to sleep on their own without any help from Mom and Dad. So when we talk about sleeping through the night, in terms of babies anyways, what we’re really just saying that they’re able to soothe themselves back to sleep using independent sleep skills. Because it's all about their self soothing ability, how they are fed really has no bearing on the wake-ups. They’re going to wake up at night, several times, for the rest of their lives, just like everyone else.

Yes, breast milk does digest faster then formula, but it is not a huge difference in the time.  Newborns can go about 2 1/2 - 3 hours between feeds if they’re breastfeeding. If they’re eating formula, that number is closer to 4 hours. So although I've seen on many mom groups to give a bottle of formula before bed to help baby sleep longer, that will not be a magic cure to your child's sleep.

Their stomachs are small and they’re going to digest liquid food quickly, whether it comes form a bottle or a breast. What does that mean for parents of newborns in regards to their newborn babies sleeping 11 - 12 hours through the night? That's not going to happen, and shouldn't happen for most newborns! But hey, it could happen. You may have that magical baby that sleep through the night at 4 weeks! But chances are, you’re going to have to get up a couple of times a night to feed your little one until they’re about 6 months old.

Now, that doesn’t mean that you should abandon all hope and not focus on sleep until 6 months of age. Its the opposite really! Teaching your baby to fall asleep independently is something that can happen from birth! Many children aren't ready to go a full 12 hours until 6 months. This also isn't dependent on whether they’re breastfed or formula fed. Both are similar when it comes to keeping baby feeling full.

So When Will My Baby Be Ready To Sleep A Long Stretch?

After the six month mark (although often times earlier!) your baby should be able to start sleeping through the night without a feed. This includes babies who are breastfed. Let’s say you breastfeed on demand, which is a very popular approach and one that I fully support if it works for you, your baby, and your schedule. I breastfed/breastfeed (Baby J is still going strong at 6+months) and have no plans to stop! But if baby’s six months of age, gaining weight at a normal rate, and able to eat as many calories as they need during the day, then the chances
are that baby is, in fact, not waking in the night for food.

The most common reason for waking at night past the six month mark is because feeding is part of their strategy for falling asleep. This is something else that we adults have in common with our babies. We all have strategies for getting to sleep. As adults, we establish our own ritual for bedtime. Mine includes locking the front door, going to the bathroom, brushing teeth and crawling to the left side of bed. Growing up, I was convinced I NEEDED a ratio on to fall asleep, then it moved to the TV on. We all have a strategy that helps to signal our brains and bodies that it’s time for sleep.

Baby sleep strategies are less sophisticated, but follow the same lines as an adults. They help baby get into a familiar, comfortable place to recognize it's time for sleep. If feeding is part of that strategy, then it doesn’t matter to them if there’s actual food coming their way. It’s the sucking motion and the feel of mom next to them that helps them to get to sleep, which they then become dependent on.

How Do I Know If Baby Is Hungry?

Obviously, every baby is different, and some may actually still be getting hungry enough for a night feeding. Here is a few indicators that can help let you know if those nighttime wake ups are the result of hunger or a lack of independent sleep skills:

• Is baby only taking a small amount when they feed in the night?
• Are they falling asleep within five minutes of starting their feed?
• Does baby eventually go back to sleep if they don’t get fed?
• Are they only asleep for 45 minutes to an hour after a nighttime feed?

If you answered yes to most or all of those, then helping them learn independent sleep skills will greatly benefit your whole family! It doesn’t mean that you can’t breast feed on demand. But will help determine if baby’s demanding a feed or if they’re looking for help getting to sleep.

Breastfeeding is an absolutely wonderful experience for both mother and baby, and I support it 100%. Having a baby who sleeps through the night is equally as magical for everyone's well-being. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t have both together!

And, as always, if you need a little help guiding you through the occasionally tricky process of teaching your baby to sleep through the night, I'm here and happy to help!