3 Secrets to Getting Twins Sleeping Well

When I was in preschool I remember asking my mom for a twin. There was a set of twins in my class, which had me fascinated. My older brother was friends with a boy who had identical twin sisters. I thought it was so cool to have someone that looked like you to be best friends with, but didn't fully understand the way babies worked clearly. For my birthday I asked for a twin, on my Christmas list that year was a twin, but *spoiler alert*, I never got one!

If you are the proud parent of twins, congratulations!  Twin babies, especially for first-time parents, can be a lot of work. However, planning ahead and noting the value of sleep for the entire family will set you all up for success for weeks/months/ and years to come.

It's typically going to be a little more complicated than teaching one baby some solid sleep skills, as you can image. If one baby wakes up crying, it is almost guaranteed that the other will follow along, and soothing two babies at the same time is tougher than one.

Can This Get More Difficult?

To further complicate the situation, twins are often premature, and preemies are naturally very sleepy babies. And because one baby crying is likely to wake the other, parents of twins are often quick to rush in and soothe the crying baby back to sleep, and that can lead to stronger feed/sleep or sleep prop associations.

I'm not going to lie, imparting those awesome sleep skills on your twins won’t be easy at first. It’s going to require a lot of determination and discipline on your part. But so is any new habit that you are trying to form. However, it’s absolutely achievable, and once your little ones have got the hang of it, you will be so so excited that you took the time to help them learn these skills.

Think about it; what would you do with the extra time you’d have once both your babies are napping at the same time and sleeping through the night? How amazing would you feel? It’s an absolute game-changer for most parents of one baby, so with two babies it is very important for everyone's sanity in the long run!

This isn't going to be easy, but I 100% promise you it will be worth it. So if you are ready to get some amazing sleep, keep on reading!

Number One: Where Babies Sleep

Take a look at their sleeping arrangements. I usually suggest putting both babies in separate rooms if you are able to. But know that it doesn’t have to be a bedroom. You can set up a pack and play in an office/large closet/quiet laundry room if that’s available. But if they are not able to be in separate spaces, it does not mean this can't be done. You can do it with both babies in the same room, but if one of them starts making some noise, having them in separate rooms can help prevent one from waking up the other. And even this set up won't be forever. It’s just a temporary setup while they are developing these new independent sleep skills, so don’t worry about giving up a room permanently. In a couple of weeks, you should be able to move them into the same room.

Number 2: Schedules Are Important

Being able to keep both your babies on relatively the same schedule will be key. The great thing about twins is that their sleep needs are going to be the same. So putting them on the same nap/ bedtime schedule is effective for both of them. You’ll likely run into a situation where one baby sleeps longer than the other, and that’s fine. I set the limit at about 30 minutes before waking the baby that is still sleeping to prevent them from getting too out of sync. At the next sleep situation, don't worry that one baby slept longer, and put them down at the same time.

Having both babies going down and waking up at the same time will be huge for all caregivers sanity. It will also give you a solid break when both children are content and sleeping.  Once everyone has to the new schedule, you’ll have a lot more time to take care of other responsibilities. You know, the extra responsibilities that come with having two babies. Think washing clothes, bottles, folding laundry, doing dishes, the list goes on! Maybe even get a little “me-time” in for some Netflix binges!

Number Three: How To Handle Overnights

As I mentioned earlier, mothers of twins are a little more likely to respond quickly when one baby wakes up crying in the night. They're also more likely to try to quiet baby down with whatever method is quickest. They do this in order to prevent them from waking up their sibling. For the first seven to ten days you are implementing these new changes, try to resist that impulse a little. Obviously you want to soothe a crying baby, but if your usual response is to rush in and offer a feed, a pacifier, or rock baby back to sleep, you are most likely impeding baby’s ability to develop those self-soothing skills. Plan to get started on a night when you don’t have to be up early or looking your absolute best the next day. If the first few nights are likely to be a little rocky. Don't forget that is is temporary. The weeks/months/years of good sleep waiting on the other side are so worth it!

As for when one baby wakes up and the other doesn’t, this is where things can get a little tricky. We want to keep them both on the same schedule, but we also don’t want to interrupt on childs sleep if we don’t have to. In this situation let your babies sleep (unless medically advised otherwise). If one wakes up for a feed, don’t wake the other one and offer a feed as well. We’re going to let sleep be the priority for now. We'll allow each of them to make up the calories during the day.

Now Enjoy Allll The Sleep...

After three or four days, something magical start to happen. As those independent sleep skills start to develop, you’ll realize that one fussing baby won’t be nearly as likely to wake up the other. That’s because they’re spending more time in deeper stages of sleep, and when a baby gets into a deep sleep. They can sleep through almost anything.

The other benefit that’s going to start taking effect is that sleep begets sleep. Overtiredness fires up our cortisol production which makes it harder for anyone to get to sleep, so as your twins start sleeping more, they’ll actually have an easier time getting to sleep, and staying asleep long enough to get into that restorative, deep stage of sleep that we’re looking for to really grow and develop.

Finally, make sure you’re ready before you get started. I see a lot of parents get started when they’re not fully committed to the process only to quit a few nights in. To me, this is thoroughly confusing for their little ones. This typically teaches them that they need to fuss louder and longer in order to get someone to come in. It makes sense because they want someone to assist them back to sleep. So if you’re not entirely sure that this is the time, that’s absolutely fine. Consistency is the key here, so don’t just “give it a try” if you don’t think you’re ready to commit. It’s going to be a lot of work but I can promise it’s going to be so, so worth it!

So when you are ready to take the plunge but may want some support through to ensure this will be successful for everyone, click here and take the first step into getting everyone amazing sleep!